Now and Then.

My partner, Joe, and I recently celebrated 37 years of being together, and I wanted to put together something that reflected the passage of time from when I was 21 to the present.

I have always liked to go through my family's photo albums and look at pictures taken of my parents, grandparents and others when they were children or young adults.  It's always given me a different impression of who they are.  I think many of us have the same curiosity about other people.

One of the projects I have been working on is a series about the LBGT community over 50 years old.  I know anyone in that age category probably has similar feelings.  However, in this youth-and-beauty-oriented gay community, there is an ever-increasing aging population that has now become invisible to the community at large.  With the series, I'm trying to find a way of presenting older LBGT to the younger generations in a way that we are not seen as a forgotten segment, but are just as vital as we once were.

So with this in mind, I've just started to work on presenting portraits of my subjects along with some image from their past which is important to them.

So I was in my photography studio (garage) the other night.  I had a number of different lighting concepts I'd thought of that I wanted to try.  Of course, during these impromptu shoots, I tend to be the easiest model to work with; I know what I want the model to do, and I don't have to talk to myself to keep me entertained (though I always enjoying spending time with me).  Anyway, as I went through the different ideas I wanted to work with, I'd needed a mirror in order to see how the light was hitting my face.  During one of my change-ups on the lighting, I'd set this little vanity mirror down on the ladder to keep it out of the way.  Looking from where my camera was, I loved the starkness of the simple image of the mirror sitting on that ledge; that's when I decided to play around with the concept of putting myself in the image through the reflection of the mirror. 

I must say that sometimes shots that look simple and easy to carry off end up being the ones that are a real pain in the neck.  Between struggling with the placement of several different light sources along with making sure to get just the right amount of face in there that I was looking for, along with not wanting to blow out any portion of the lit areas with too much light -- well, I tweaked it enough to where I got this shot that I was finally pleased with. 

Someone who saw the image said it was a very telling self-portrait.  I knew he got it as it does tend to represent the way that I have difficulties dealing with the world directly, and how sometimes I have to look at the world through indirect means.

One of the things I love about photography is how I can explore different ideas and thoughts and create them in a visual way.  With this self-portrait, I am remembering that throughout my life, I have spent so much time watching the world go by looking from the wrong side of the window, but how I'm coming to realize how wonderful it is to open my doors and walk in the parade.